Chapter Forty-Seven: Drinking Freely, Unburdening the Heart

Though it seemed that these few were enjoying themselves in reckless drinking and merrymaking, each of their hearts bore memories that could not be forgotten. Perhaps only through such abandon could they temporarily release themselves from the grip of their past. Every time someone comforted another, their words flowed with reason and eloquence, yet when such troubles befell themselves, they realized all those so-called consolations were nothing but empty words, utterly useless. The only thing one could rely on was a heart, already riddled with wounds, still struggling on. Only when one truly no longer cared could one truly let go. But how does one teach oneself not to care? This question is far too profound; certainly not something that can be solved with a few comforting words. Perhaps everyone has memories they wish to forget—then do not force yourself to forget them; let them remain as deep recollections instead. Who knows, perhaps one day, when you stop trying to dig them out from your memory, they will quietly leave you of their own accord. What’s most important is not to force anything.

“You truly do have a remarkable tolerance for alcohol! An entire jar has gone down and you’re still so calm, not a hint of change in your expression or heartbeat.” Meng Yuyuan unabashedly lay her head against Yushang’s chest, listening to his heartbeat, then pointed and laughed at him, leaving Yushang rather embarrassed. After all, she was a woman, and a woman who already belonged to someone. To share such intimacy with him now inevitably made him uneasy. What’s more, her beloved and her protector were both present; it would not do to provoke any discord. Fortunately, their usual camaraderie was like that of family—open and unreserved—so no one paid much heed to the ambiguous gestures between the pair. Perhaps, in everyone’s eyes, these were but trivial details. Yet Yushang’s heart was uneasy; he could not distinguish whether it was the strong wine or Meng Yuyuan’s careless touch that left him so unsettled.

“So Brother Yu is the one who hides his talents! I had hoped to get you drunk, but now, I’m the one feeling dizzy, and you remain so composed—it truly impresses me! It seems there’s nothing I can surpass you in, really makes me jealous!” Yu Xiaoran cast him a look full of admiration. Unknowingly, he had already begun to regard Yushang as a goal to chase, but every action Yushang took won his respect, compelling him willingly to stand beneath him. One must understand that Yu Xiaoran, proud and lofty by nature, would never so easily submit to another, and few in this world could inspire such words from him.

“Who says you’re inferior to him in everything? At least you have me, a fine woman, by your side—that alone puts you above him!” Yan Xuesu said triumphantly, not clear whether she was supporting him or simply praising herself.

Yushang felt awkward—these sharp-tongued girls always found his weakness to tease. He didn’t know how to retort. Luckily, Yu Xiaoran took up her words, saying, “Yes, having you is the proudest, happiest thing in my life!” After speaking, he walked to her side, gently caressed her enchanting face, and gazed at her with deep affection.

“You two are so syrupy! I concede defeat. No matter the occasion, you can flaunt your love so recklessly, showing the kind of affection others could never match!” Lanwu teased, but in truth, she envied their intimacy. Unlike that troublesome Xiaoyin, who only ever annoyed or vexed her, never once confessing his feelings, not even in jest. At first, she resented him for not treating her as others treat their beloveds—not only withholding affection but even bullying her. Yet, later, she found herself fond of this way of expressing love. Some words need not be spoken; they could still be felt deeply between hearts.

“They’re just showing off, making us lonely souls jealous! You two are too cruel, openly inviting our envy!” Yin Boxuan spoke suddenly from his corner, his tone betraying both jealousy and longing for their affection. He then glanced covertly at Meng Yuyuan and sighed helplessly.

“Brother Yin, why are you hiding in such a remote corner? If you hadn’t just spoken, I wouldn’t have noticed you at all!” Yushang looked toward Yin Boxuan, somewhat amused and exasperated. His gauzy sleeve had been torn, his belt missing, and his hair was a chaotic mess, the very image of a drunkard.

“All thanks to those wild girls! You weren’t here, so you escaped their torment, but I’ve been subjected to their mischief all night. The others even laughed at my misery, truly outrageous!” Yin Boxuan glared at the drunken crowd, his disheveled state hinting at the ordeal he had just endured.

“Well, you always bully me, so today we had to teach you a lesson, or I’d be letting myself down!” Meng Yuyuan laughed heartily. Seeing the fruits of their labor on Yin Boxuan delighted her to tears. Who would have thought that someone so sharp-tongued could be brought so low? It was gratifying! Perhaps the barrier between them would dissolve with tonight’s drunkenness—if only they could let go of the past and live well in the present.

---

“Sigh... In the future, I’ll keep my distance from you all, alright? With your antics, you’ll kill me sooner or later!” Yin Boxuan spoke helplessly. These seemingly gentle girls could be terrifying when they lost their minds. Best not to provoke them lightly, lest he meet some unpredictable fate.

“Glad you recognize our power! Let’s see if you dare bully our Yuanyuan again!” Yan Xuesu said smugly, her demeanor like a spoiled heiress, so different from her usual seductive, graceful persona. It seemed that, no matter how a woman appeared outwardly, within her lived a mischievous little girl.

“Will there even be a future?” Yin Boxuan muttered to himself. If heaven could grant him another chance, he’d exchange anything for it, but alas, there was none. After the competition ended, she would leave with her beloved, and who knew when, or if ever, he would see her again. At the thought, Yin Boxuan grew sorrowful, struggled to stand from his corner, staggered to the table, and poured a jar of wine down his throat. He seemed to wish to numb his pain with strong drink.

Meng Yuyuan seemed to sense his feelings. Suddenly, she felt guilty toward this devoted man, and so she took a cup from the table and drained it in one gulp. It was as if she sought to punish herself in this way, yet Lan Bingxian, seeing her pain, felt heartbroken, snatched her cup, and drank it himself.

“Brother Xian, give it back to me, give it back!” Meng Yuyuan pleaded, her voice tinged with tears. She didn’t know why, but at this moment, she only wanted to drown her sorrows in drink and then cry her heart out. She longed to vent—her grandfather’s hatred, the grievances she’d suffered, her unrequited devotion to Yin Boxuan. As others wounded her, she was also wounding others. All things are entwined in karma; none can escape alone. Perhaps, at this moment, the only thing she could do was cleanse her selfish yet wounded heart with strong wine.

“Hush now, don’t make a fuss.” Lan Bingxian drew her into his arms, soothing her. Seeing her torment herself this way pained him deeply; he wished he could bear all her suffering for her.

“Why won’t you let me drink? Didn’t everyone agree not to leave until we’re drunk?” Meng Yuyuan buried her head in Lan Bingxian’s embrace, murmuring, her voice trembling with suppressed sobs.

“That’s right, don’t stop her! If we’re drinking, let’s drink freely—otherwise, not a drop!” Lanwu pulled Meng Yuyuan over, gave her a cup, and said, “She understands Meng Yuyuan’s feelings. Once, she too had felt this way, but back then, rules prevented her from indulging. Now, things are different—everyone can finally relax, so let go of all worries. If we’re to play, let’s play to our hearts’ content; if we’re to drink, let’s drink to our fill. Tonight, no one is allowed to be reserved—let it all out!”

“Since everyone’s here, why don’t we follow the tradition of sworn brotherhood? No need for blood or kneeling, just drink these fine wines and let the bottles bear witness. No matter what fate awaits us, or what we become, so long as we remember our brothers, let our bond remain unchanged!” Leng Huaiyi suddenly climbed onto the table, held up a cup, half-drunk and half-awake, and spoke. In his hazy state, he had a premonition that after the competition, everyone would part ways, each following their own path. He didn’t want identity or destiny to estrange or divide their friendship. So, this time, he wanted to be childish, to ask for a promise: that they’d remain brothers for life, their bond unchanged unto death.

---

“Even without your proposal, I think we’ve all long had this thought. Since we’re together today, let’s make it official—lifelong brothers!” Yushang raised his cup. In truth, he had already regarded these people as companions through life and death. Some were new acquaintances, some had clashed before, and none knew how the future would unfold, but in this moment, he wished their bond to be eternal.

“Why must it be brothers and not sisters?” Meng Yuyuan grumbled to herself. Were they excluding the three women? After all they’d endured together, how could gender alone exclude them?

“Well, we never saw much femininity in you three anyway. We’ve always treated you as equals—as men!” Yin Boxuan seized the chance for revenge, quickly teasing, provoking a roar of laughter from everyone—except the three women.

“You’re asking for trouble!” Meng Yuyuan grabbed something from the table and threw it at him, but Yin Boxuan dodged in time.

“Just wait and see how I deal with you!” Yan Xuesu glared at him, threateningly.

“Don’t worry, we won’t let you off so easily!” Lanwu echoed with a mischievous look.

“Haha! My good brothers and sisters—cheers!” Yushang said, draining his cup in one bold gulp.

“Cheers!” The others followed, drinking heartily.