The woman he mentioned during the interview.

Chapter 11: Sha Monk’s Exasperation Toward Zhu Bajie (This Chapter Is Free)

Xili, Shen Ma, Xia Qi, and Xiao Yunzi were conducting market research for their future fortune plans along Welcome Street in Longjiang City. Lost in thought, Xili’s concentration was abruptly broken by a weathered, deep voice.

“Uh... the Earth is round? It’s the Earth! Sister Feng! Sister Furong! Aren’t those the famous celebrities from decades ago on Earth?” The old man was speaking in terms familiar only to Earthlings. Could he be someone who, like Xili, had unexpectedly traveled here from Earth? With this thought, Xili quickly followed the voice.

As he approached, he saw beneath a tall wall an old man with a scruffy beard and disheveled hair, lazily basking in the sun. The old man’s eyes, squinting against the sunlight, brightened upon seeing Xili draw near. He then feebly called out, “The sky is blue, the Earth is round. Fate has brought us together. Sister Feng cries, Sister Furong fusses, but I only hope those destined come soon. The ultimate secret manual is given only to the fated!”

“Sir, why is the Earth round? Do you know Sister Feng and Sister Furong?” Xili knelt before the old man and whispered, “Are you Brother Pig?”

The scruffy old man, without opening his eyes fully, snorted coldly, “Where did you come from, young imp? Why so many pointless questions?”

“Uh... old man, what are you saying? Get up and answer!” Shen Ma, following behind Xili, urged impatiently.

Xili shot Shen Ma a glare and patiently said, “Sir, these questions matter greatly to me. Please, tell me.”

“To the fated!” The old man suddenly pushed a yellowed, thread-bound book into Xili’s arms. Then, unsteadily rising, muttered to himself, “Oh dear, I’m off!” With a swift movement, he vanished, leaving only a fleeting shadow behind. No trace of him remained when Xili and his companions looked around.

“Ah... damn! A master!” Shen Ma gasped, mouth agape in shock.

“My master is Zhu Bajie? Isn’t that the super-popular guy on Earth who’s infamous for driving nobles mad and making everyone else embarrassed? Damn his eyes…” Xili was as stunned as Shen Ma, collapsing to the ground in disbelief.

Xia Qi and Xiao Yunzi often heard stories about such elusive immortals from Old Wang’s tales, but hearing and witnessing were different matters. Xiao Yunzi, the first to regain composure, stammered as she pulled at Xili’s sleeve, “Big... Big... Brother, hurry... look... what did that old immortal give you?”

“Yeah, quick, look!” Xia Qi urged anxiously.

Still swaying under Xiao Yunzi’s tug, Xili cleared his throat and gradually regained his composure. He carefully held the yellowed book. Shen Ma, Xia Qi, and Xiao Yunzi crowded around to see.

“Uh, why isn’t there a title on the yellowed cover? This isn’t how martial arts manuals look on TV!” Xili murmured, staring at the blank, faded cover. He then flipped to the first page. Reading its content, Xili let out a loud shout, sprang up, and cursed, “Damn it, pighead! Are you kidding me? Is this for real? Who plays tricks like this?”

“Oh my God!” Xili’s sudden outburst startled Shen Ma, Xia Qi, and Xiao Yunzi.

“Boss, what’s written here? I don’t recognize these characters,” Xia Qi asked, pointing to several unfamiliar symbols on the opened page.

“If you did, that’d be spooky,” Xili shot her a look.

Xili’s frustration deepened. The first page bore Chinese characters from Earth, reading: “Don’t die, just practice if you’re okay!”—eight bold characters mocking him. Trembling, Xili turned to page two, which read: “Chasing stars and catching the moon.” Without delving into details, he flipped through to page four, the last one, filled with related content. He barely glanced at it, then furiously cursed, “What the hell is this crap? What kind of nonsense is this?”

His mind a whirl of disappointment, frustration, and confusion, Xili struggled to calm down. Seeing Shen Ma, Xia Qi, and Xiao Yunzi’s bewildered faces, he snapped, “Stop staring, let’s keep shopping.”

Though full of questions, no one dared speak after witnessing Xili’s twisted, flushed expression.

Meanwhile, the scruffy old man who had given the book now stood high above the Dragon Continent, transforming into a red-bearded, dark-faced, good-natured Sha Monk. Standing beside him was Zhu Bajie, both gazing below, watching Xili’s maddening ordeal unfold.

“Heh heh heh, Second Brother, the few phrases you taught me really work. You’re definitely smarter than me,” Sha Monk scratched his untidy hair and grinned sheepishly at Zhu Bajie.

“Hahaha, look who I am! With this escape technique, that kid shouldn’t die now,” Zhu Bajie said confidently.

“Second Brother, I feel like this kid has your personality. How come you—” Sha Monk began but was cut off by Zhu Bajie.

“Hey, I have no choice,” Zhu Bajie interrupted, not wanting to hear more.

“Whose fault is it? You sneaked a peek at Chang’e bathing and asked me to cover for you. But Erlang Shen caught you red-handed. They exiled us here to guard the star systems and sealed our transformation powers. What a misery,” Sha Monk shook his head helplessly.

“The Jade Emperor sealed our powers because he feared we’d transform into handsome forms and shirk duties to enjoy mortal life. Luckily, I was smart enough to learn a transformation spell from Master, giving each of us one form. Now I can live carefree for a hundred years,” Zhu Bajie said, eyes gleaming mischievously.

“That’s great, but you went and stirred up trouble by bringing this kid to my star system. Sigh…” Sha Monk sighed.

“Did I want trouble? The monkey gave me a transformation spell that matches the kid’s catchphrase. I’m doomed! On my first day, that kid made me change forms eighteen times!” Zhu Bajie frowned suspiciously. “Could all this be the monkey’s plan? Otherwise, what are the odds?”

Is everything truly predestined, or mere coincidence?

“Oh, that is quite the coincidence,” Sha Monk glanced down at Dragon Continent.

“You think if I turned into a handsome guy chasing girls, and my catchphrase kept transforming me, wouldn’t I scare away all the ladies? How could I survive? So I had the bright idea to assign this kid to your star system. It’s been tens of thousands of years since the demons disturbed the mortal realm. I’m free, so I’ll transform into him and enjoy mortal life. That kid’s underworld identity has plenty of beautiful girls!” Zhu Bajie bit his finger, eyes full of longing.

“After all these years, you’re still the same, Second Brother. You’re disrupting the mortal order. Aren’t you afraid the King of Hell will complain?” Sha Monk warned.

“That’s why I came to talk to you. Nothing must happen to him on your watch. With this defensive skill, he can protect himself and not die. When our term ends and we return to Heaven, we’ll bring him back. Perfect plan,” Zhu Bajie boasted. “Sha Junior Brother, am I not clever?”

“Uh…” Sha Monk was speechless. He’d been roped into Zhu Bajie’s schemes again.

It turned out Zhu Bajie’s earlier excuse was a lie; the real reason for exile was spying on Chang’e bathing. If Xili had overheard this, he’d surely have exploded in rage.

Back on Welcome Street, Xili and his companions resumed their cheerful market exploration. Xia Qi and Xiao Yunzi bounced around, examining this and that with childlike delight.

“Boss, I want this! Give me money!” Xia Qi pointed to a small accessory on a nearby stall and demanded.

Following her finger, Xili’s eyes lit up. “Do girls really like this kind of thing?”

“What kind of question is that? Who wouldn’t like such a nice thing?” Xia Qi urged impatiently, “Hurry up with the money!”

“Oh my, what a good eye, miss! This is new merchandise from ‘Fragrant Rose Pavilion.’ Smell the fragrance, it lingers long!” The middle-aged female vendor eagerly promoted her goods.

“Second Brother, what’s this called?” Xili suppressed his excitement and asked Shen Ma.

Shen Ma looked at Xili as if he were a monster, scrutinizing him before saying, “Big Brother, no wonder Third Sister says you’re clueless. How can you not know what this is?”

“No more nonsense, just tell me!” Xili’s voice cracked with urgency.