Chapter Thirty-Three: The Hero to the Rescue!

What remained was how to deal with this fellow.

Killing him would not do. This was, after all, sacred Buddhist ground, no place for bloodshed. Besides, if the lecherous wastrel died here, the people from Prince Ning’s estate would surely launch a full investigation. If that dragged Miss Mei into it, things would become troublesome indeed. After all, those vile servants all knew he had come for her.

Letting him go was out of the question, too. Once he came to, he would certainly begin making trouble again.

If he could neither be killed nor released, there was only one solution left.

A wicked little smile flashed across Li Zhao’s face. He struck like lightning, dislocating the man’s jaw and wrenching the joints of his arms and legs apart. Then he dragged him by one leg toward a nearby bamboo grove.

Within the grove stood a latrine, and behind it a foul cesspit piled high with filth. It was midsummer, and flies swarmed above it in a humming black cloud. Countless fat maggots, each more than an inch long and tailed, crawled back and forth through the dirty sludge. Even a glance was enough to turn the stomach.

"Go on down. You and those maggots are one and the same." With that, he hurled the man into the pit and left at once.

The unconscious libertine hit the cesspool and was immediately choked by the filth, thrashing wildly in panic.

Fortunately, the pit was not too deep. If he sat on the bottom, straightened his back, and stretched his neck, he could barely keep his head above the surface to breathe. But with the joints of his hands and feet all dislocated, climbing out was impossible.

He tried to cry for help, but with his jaw removed, not a single word could escape him. All he could do was groan helplessly.

The maggots swarmed toward him as if welcoming a new companion. Combined with the stench, the scene was enough to make him retch violently. He vomited again and again, then fainted in the mire, only to be choked awake by the filthy water and forced to swallow a mouthful of it.

He struggled to lift his head and catch a few gasps of air, only to be overcome by nausea and pass out again, then wake once more from the foul water forcing its way into his lungs. This repeated many times until, at last, he managed to lean against one side of the earthen wall and escape the fate of drowning in the cesspit.

The poor fellow had grown up swaddled in silk and fed on delicacies, pampered from birth. When had he ever suffered such torment? His mental defenses collapsed at once. Sitting in the pit, he burst into wails of helpless sorrow, more pitiful than a newborn infant.

Meanwhile, elsewhere.

Having dealt with the libertine, Li Zhao returned to the edge of the liberation pond and looked toward the white-clad figure in the distance, weighing his next move.

Should he slip away without a sound, or should he go over, explain everything clearly, and warn Miss Mei?

If he told the truth, he would reveal himself and invite all manner of trouble. But if he simply left, his conscience would not rest easy.

Just as he stood torn between the two, heaven made the decision for him.

"Aah—plop!"

"Miss! Miss! Somebody come quick! My lady has fallen into the water!"

The fish in the pond were competing for food when a golden carp suddenly leaped from the surface, startling Miss Mei as she was feeding them. Her footing slipped, and she toppled straight into the liberation pond.

The water was deep, and Miss Mei could not swim at all. She sank at once like a lead weight. Her maid, Xiaoman, was terrified. Sadly, she could not swim either. All she could do was shout for help, so anxious that tears sprang to her eyes.

But there were no visitors around the pond. Even if she screamed herself hoarse, it would be useless. Fortunately, Li Zhao saw it happen.

"Don’t be afraid. I’ll save your lady." Plop.

He sprinted to the edge of the pond, shed his outer robe and boots, and dove straight into the water. As a surfing enthusiast, Li Zhao was an excellent swimmer and could even open his eyes underwater.

After a few strokes, he quickly found Miss Mei. She had already sunk to the bottom and was struggling helplessly, but he did not rush to her side at once.

A drowning person is in a state of utter panic, flailing wildly with both hands. If someone approaches too soon, the victim may cling to the rescuer with astonishing strength, often dragging both of them under. More than one would-be savior had ended up drowning that way.

The safest method was to let the drowning person struggle a little until their strength was nearly exhausted, and only then swim over to rescue them.

So Li Zhao surfaced, drew several deep breaths to replenish his oxygen, and, when he judged the time right, dove back down.

As expected, Miss Mei was nearly spent and barely able to struggle anymore.

Li Zhao swam swiftly behind her, slipped one arm beneath her armpit and across her chest to hold her firmly, then used his other arm to stroke powerfully for the surface. In no time at all, he dragged her ashore.

"Miss, you cannot die... w-wah!" Xiaoman stumbled and crawled over, bursting into tears at once.

Miss Mei had swallowed far too much water and was no longer breathing, lying there as still as if she were dead.

"Stop crying. Your lady is not dead. I’ll bring her back!"

Li Zhao had experience with this sort of thing. He quickly lifted her, turned her head downward to let the water drain from her stomach, then laid her flat on the ground. After pressing his ear to her chest and hearing nothing, he knew he had to begin CPR.

First he cleared the foreign matter from her mouth and nose. Then he sealed his mouth over hers and gave her artificial breaths, one after another. After several forceful compressions on her chest, he felt the faintest sign of a heartbeat.

"Lecher! Let go of my lady... I’ll beat you to death!"

"Quit making trouble. I’m saving her! Let go at once—ow, that hurts! Why are you biting people now?"

Xiaoman rushed at him, scratching and biting like a rabbit driven to desperation. She lacked much real strength, but she was fierce enough to be frightening.

Saving a life came first. With someone flailing beside him, how was he supposed to continue mouth-to-mouth?

With no other choice, Li Zhao pinched Xiaoman’s chin, forcing her teeth away from his arm, then gave her rosy little mouth a hard kiss.

Many stage plays and dramas had shown this before: a kiss could calm a woman down.

The trick worked. Xiaoman stopped struggling and sat there in a daze, like a wooden doll.

Only then did Li Zhao free his hands and continue giving Miss Mei artificial respiration, one breath, then another, then another. After more than a dozen breaths, a few weak groans escaped her lips, and at last Miss Mei began to breathe on her own.

Seeing that she had been saved, Li Zhao finally let out a long breath. Then he took a closer look and blurted, "My word, she’s beautiful. A celestial maiden has descended to earth."

During the fall, Miss Mei’s veil had slipped away, revealing her true face: skin white as snow, bright eyes, flawless teeth, graceful brows, full cheeks. Not a single feature was anything less than perfect. Most striking of all was the crimson mole at the center of her brow, lending an already breathtaking face an added air of holiness.

If someone said this woman had descended from the heavens, few would doubt it.

No wonder the lecherous wastrel had taken wicked notice of her. Faced with such a peerless beauty, very few men would be able to control themselves. A mistake of the sort was, in a way, understandable.

More than that, there was something about Miss Mei’s features and expression that felt oddly familiar to Li Zhao. She looked like someone he had seen before.

And then he remembered. The lady by Qujiang Pond, the one beside that handsome older gentleman. The two women shared seven or eight parts of the same appearance and bearing, and they both bore the surname Mei. Could there be some connection between them?

...

"Mm... what happened to me?"

"Miss, you’re finally awake! You scared Xiaoman half to death, wahhh!"

After a while, Miss Mei slowly opened her eyes. Xiaoman also came around and threw herself into her lady’s arms, sobbing bitterly all over again. By then, she had dimly understood that Li Zhao truly had been trying to save someone.

Only, the method he used was far too indecent. A scoundrel, utterly and completely a scoundrel.

"My humble self, Mei Shuying, thanks you, sir, for saving my life."

After resting a little longer, Miss Mei recovered enough strength to stand with Xiaoman’s support. Her long white dress was completely soaked, clinging tightly to her body and showing off her proud curves to full effect. Beneath it, the outline of a red undergarment could even be seen faintly. Such a sight made Li Zhao momentarily dazed once more.

It should be noted that while women in the Tang era indeed favored plump beauty, this kind of plumpness did not mean flabby fat. It meant full and well-proportioned, with flesh where flesh should be and slimness where slimness belonged.

On the other side, Miss Mei was also somewhat unnerved, a blush spreading across her delicate face. She had long since regained consciousness. Though she had not opened her eyes, she could still feel someone blowing air into her mouth. How mortifying that was.

Xiaoman’s little face was flushed red as well. She, too, had become a victim of the whole affair.

After that, Li Zhao briefly explained what had happened.

He only said that he had accidentally overheard someone plotting harm against Miss Mei, so he had rushed over to warn her. By chance and fortune, he had ended up saving her from the water.

As for ambushing the libertine and tossing him into the cesspit, he said not a single word.

"The two of you should leave quickly. I must go as well."

"Sir, please tell us your name. I shall repay this great kindness one day."

"There is no need. Cause and effect have their own cycle. Consider it payment for a debt owed in the past."

"Sir... sir!"

This was no place to linger. Li Zhao snatched up his clothes and boots and ran off at full speed, vanishing in an instant.

Unfortunately, in his haste, he accidentally left something behind.

A fan.

The weather had been sweltering lately, so Li Zhao had begun carrying a folding fan. It was nothing precious, just an inexpensive white paper fan bought from a street stall for five copper coins.

To make it look a little nicer, he had even asked Aunt Qing to paint a lotus blossom on it. The petals were in full bloom, graceful and alluring, and atop the broad lotus leaf lay a tiny green frog, silly and charming, rendered so vividly it seemed almost alive.

Li Zhao had then personally written a poem beside it:

Alone upon the pond, I sit like a crouching tiger;
beneath the green shade, I nurture my spirit.
When spring arrives and I have not spoken first,
which worm would dare make a sound?

The signature read: the most handsome rogue captain in history, Li Zhao.

The fan naturally ended up in Miss Mei’s hands, and then, with her little maid, she hurried away from the liberation pond.